I love and fancy my girlfriend, but I can’t keep erect when having sex. I am 42 and otherwise a picture of good health

I am 42 years old and always seem to quickly lose my erection during sex. I love and fancy my girlfriend, but this problem has been with me pretty much all of my life. I have been to my GP, had all the tests for pretty much everything and I am the picture of health. I can get an erection but, as soon as I penetrate her, it goes …

Your mind may be playing tricks with you. Such a well-entrenched pattern of erectile failure can start as an occasional inability to maintain erection, but become a self-fulfilling prophecy, when your anxiety about it actually becomes a large part of the cause. So, during lovemaking, instead of enjoying feelings of love, pleasure and sensuality, you may be imbued with performance anxiety, which seriously hampers your natural arousal responses. Have you tried some of the erectile dysfunction medications, which can be physiologically useful and help build confidence? There can certainly be treatable psychological reasons for consistent erectile failure. But the best approach at this point is to immediately stop trying to maintain an erection and focus on the giving and receiving of pleasure without intercourse. It is vital for you to reframe sex as something relaxing and sensually pleasing rather than a goal or chore. Take time to fully explore all the non-penetrative things you both enjoy, and have fun experimenting. Only return to intercourse when your confidence has come back – and even then think of penetration as a side attraction rather than the “main event”.

Continue reading…

Related Blogs

    Powered by Yahoo! Answers

    How To Become An Authority!

    Enter your name and email address below to receive a FREE copy of our special ebook!

    Success! Please check your email.

    Pin It on Pinterest

    Share This